Week 2

One thing that I was really impressed by in this weeks discussions was the theories on family relations. We talked about four mains ones, which were the systems theory, exchange theory, conflict theory and symbolic interaction theory. These were really interesting to me especially looking at how they apply to my family.

I started thinking about the symbolic interaction theory, and how when you've been living with your family your whole life there are so many unspoken rules, and once you go outside of your family at can become so easy to misinterpret words and actions and what not. Often times this can cause conflict.

As I was pondering this idea outside of class, I just had this really neat thought, that often times in marriage this is the cause of a lot of conflict. Because each of you come from different family systems with different unspoken rules, and all these theories apply, and it can be difficult putting them together sometimes. I have noticed this in my marriage. I got married about 5 months ago, and most of the conflicts that have arrised are because are families do things differently, and our interections and relationships with our families were different. One example was in my family my dad always did the grocery shopping, and like many other families, in my husband's family his mom did the grocery shopping. So when we got married, we decided that I would do the grocery shopping, but that was kind of wierd for me. And sometimes he will come with me, and it's weird because I expect him to push the cart, and he expects me to. So there have been a few instances where I started walking away and he starts walking and then is like, "Uh, aren't you going to bring the cart?" and first of all, that cart is like twice my size, he's the big strong man, why can't he push it? Usually I just push it anyway, but when I ask him to push it, he just says, "you're the girl, you're supposed to push it." It is just interesting that in his mind that is a rule, that the girl does the grocery shopping and pushes the cart, and of course in my mind, it's opposite. So that is just a simple example, but it was just interesting to see how most conflicts I have faced and most people face are because they are coming together with two separate ideas of how the family is ran and what not.